I’m working on a prequel story in the Sentinel Witches series. When I first started writing the series, I’d planned on Jade, Catlyn’s godmother, to not be in a relationship. She was supposed to be holding a candle of unrequited love for Catlyn’s father, Ian. Even after 20 years!
As I’m writing, a character shows up on the page, Dorian. And all of a sudden Jade is attracted to him, perhaps even falling in love. WTH! I hadn’t planned on that happening! Instead of fighting it, I let it flow and wrote an awesome sex scene between the two of them yesterday. As I pondered over the development of the relationship between Jade and Dorian, I made the connection of where Jade had been when Catlyn couldn’t reach her in book 1. She was with Dorian!
I love when that happens! I love when I trust the story and my innate abilities to allow the story to flow. When I do, magic happens. When I try to force the story to conform into what I think it should be or how I “planned” it to happen, my writing become stilted. I struggle to find the right words. I was working on a scene this past weekend, and every word I wrote was a struggle. Then I realized I was trying to force a scene that didn’t belong to fit my outline. When I released it, and rewrote a prior scene, allowing it to flow, the words rushed onto the page.
This is a good analogy to life. When we allow ourselves to be in the flow of Spirit and listen to our guidance through our intuition, our lives can be filled with ease and joy. It’s when we try to force life to go according to our “plan,” or go against our intuition, our life becomes a struggle. Nothing works for us and we try harder, push harder, to “make it happen.” And then we get upset and complain the Law of Attraction doesn’t work.
We hit a writer’s block.
We feel blocked and that only obstacles are in our path. Those obstacles are our own making because we’re trying to make, to force, what we want to happen. We do this because society has taught us to “just do it,” or “you’ll succeed, if you make it happen.” But that is the old paradigm. In Human Design terms, that is the way of the Manifestor, which has dominated our society. The new way is that of the Projector, who lives in flow.
When we get out of our heads, out of our egos, and surrender to Spirit, our story, our lives, flow through us. Life flows. Opportunities and doors open. The story of our life we write is now so much better than we imagined. Connections we didn’t see before are now clear.
In my writing, I suddenly see why I wrote a scene in one book while writing another. Plots and pieces fit together between stories that my conscious, ego mind couldn’t have ever smashed together. When I trust my intuition and guidance from Spirit (Goddess), my stories—and my life—flows. I’m filled with joy and anticipation. I can’t wait to write to discover how the story unfolds.
In my life, I’m excited to witness the amazing things Spirit has for me unfold. Living in flow and surrender makes my life filled with magic, joy, fun, and even intrigue. It’s taken me a lot of years and practice to reach this state.
Now, I can tell when I’m forcing things to happen, because nothing seems to work. I feel like I’m banging my head against a brick wall. I’m unhappy, and life feels dreary. As soon as I literally take a deep breath and let go of the need instilled by society to “make it happen,” I’m back in flow. The obstacles I was banging my head against become blessings I wasn’t acknowledging.
This happened recently. I recorded the narration of Crossroads to Destiny, all 34 chapters, without editing, without listening to them. I was pushing, forcing, to get the audiobook done by my arbitrary due date. When I started editing, I discovered, to my horror, I’d set the gain on my microphone down too far. To achieve the volume I needed for submitting the audiobook to the retail sites, it introduced a hiss and my voice sounded over-processed and awful. I couldn’t use any of the files.
I cried. All the work I’d done for the past month gone, wasted.
Once I got over the disappointment, I listened to other audiobooks again alongside mine. I realized I was reading the story—and extremely fast. In my push to finish it, I rushed my narration. I wasn’t telling the story or giving the readers time to absorb or enjoy it. The obstacle of the sound issues turned into a blessing. I’m now taking my time to narrate the book to allow the reader to enjoy it. The result is so, so, much better!
The audiobook won’t be issued at the same time as the ebook and print book, and I’m okay with that. I’d rather take more time and produce a great product than rush a crappy one.
I invite you to consider where you’re pushing in your writing or in your life. What are you trying to force, to “make” happen? Take a breath, go for a walk, and release the need to push. Just as your breath flows easier when you allow it to flow, allow your story—your life—to flow. Trust your intuition. Trust the guidance you receive from Source. All is well!!